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Transforming Leadership

Unbeatable Lawyer Says There Are Two Ways to Communicate - Which Do You Use?

3/21/2018

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Growing up I loved split pea soup.

My Dad is a cook to be reckon with. Even though he doesn’t follow a certain recipe he has a “feel” for how much of each ingredient to toss in. And man, this soup is incredible. To this day, I could inhale bowl after bowl of the chunky goodness. How do you eat this soup from the heavens?

With a spoon of course.

Not a fork (Thanks for the ground-breaking lesson Kelan)

It’s the same with communication and influence…

Gerry Spence, the notorious lawyer who has never lost a case, author of How to Win An Argue And Win Every Time talks about communication being like eating vegetable soup.
You can eat it with a fork and stab a carrot… a hunk of potato… and a token pea. And you could eat it that way. But it’s going to take a while. It’s going to slow the whole process down. The same thing when you try to pick just the right words when you speak.

Instead, you can use a spoon and consume it altogether. Because that’s how it’s meant to be consumed. Words are meant to flow freely as well.

Spence says,
“If I am real, if I am speaking
from the heart zone,
the right words will come.”
 
So true! Get in the right emotional state and BOOM. The right words… the right stories… the right connections will come flowing through you…

When I used to be a “mess of a communicator” one of the things that stopped me was a belief that I had to know exactly the right words before I spoke. Garbage! This made it way harder and more awkward.

Now I follow Abracadabra. No, not how magicians use it before they yank a rabbit out of a hat. This word comes from the word “Avra Kedoobar” meaning, “I will create as I speak”.

Create as you speak. It’s way easier. You’ll have way more emotional power in your words. You’ll come across with greater authenticity to your listener. And yes, going in with a game-plan is a wise decision. But once you’ve prepped and the show has begun - let it flow freely.

And sure, you may make mistakes when you talk, but so what?
 
You just correkt *correct*, (whoops!) along the way.
Or laugh at it. Or use it to your advantage.
 
So remember: influence from a spoon. Not a fork.
 
Kelan Ern

P.S. If you want more influence secrets I highly recommend grabbing a copy of my Influence Acceleration newsletter. It is a stick of influence and persuasion dynamite. Inside you'll learn: According to British scientists, these five words are biologically addicting to the brain. These simple words raised levels of serotonin and endorphins in the brain. In fact, a best-selling author was notorious for sprinkling them in her books making them "unputdownable". No, it was not J.K Rowling but someone even MORE successful.
Check out this influence newsletter to learn more. 

Read a free copy by clicking here
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